Mwahaha haha HAHAHAHA. What’s up Misfits? Did you enjoy my evil laugh? It doesn’t really translate through written word, but trust me, it was pretty awesome…trust me. Why am I laughing so maniacally you ask? Wait…you really don’t know? Well, they do say there are no dumb questions. My behavior is due to Halloween being just a week away! Duh! Who doesn’t love the holiday where we get to dress up, beg for candy from strangers (avoid vans at all costs kids) and upvote spooky boi memes on Reddit? The answer to that my friends is no one! In some way, shape or form we all love Halloween.
I personally love this holiday. I look forward to hastily throwing together a couples costume with my girlfriend within the last week and it usually comes out pretty awesome. We’re going as Vincent Vega and Mia Wallace from Pulp fiction this year, check in next week for a pic! One year we were super prepared and we went as members of S.A.M.C.R.O. from Sons of Anarchy. (Check out how big my nose is!)
Check that out. If you’re wondering where we got our jackets, I made those bad boys myself, it’s ok to be super impressed. But enough about me, I didn’t write this post to gloat about my impeccable costume making skills, I wrote to discuss what we all really want to know during the spooky season: WHAT MOVIES SHOULD YOU WATCH?
With a week to go until Halloween, we only have 168 precious hours left to fit in all the creepy and scary movies we can stand! There is no time to waste people! So without further ado, here are my top 5 movie suggestions to help you binge on more than candy during this last ghoulish week of the month.
Before we begin, I want you to note two things. First, all of these movies can be watched on Netflix. Second, this list should not be considered greatest movies of all time, rather a list of movies that are entertaining and will set a frightening mood so that you can prepare for Halloween, so don’t judge me too harshly alright? Well now that we got that straightened out, let’s get going, shall we?
The horror genre of movies has been known to be a bit ridiculous with excessive and unnecessary gore and blood accompanied by a few twists and turns that make it worthwhile. V/H/S is not free from these stereotypes thrust upon horror movies, but that is honestly what makes it so great and enjoyable. This movie is about a few friends that find some, you guessed it, VHS tapes. These tapes contain several gruesome stories about murder, monsters, mistresses and much much more (Alliteration galore!). Why these tapes are located in an old man’s basement and why these guys decide to break into said basement is beyond me, but that’s the narrative the film crew decided to go with. Each tape they find is a small movie within the movie. Some are cheesy and some are pretty good, yet somehow still cheesy. My favorite is called Second Honeymoon, so keep an eye out for that one. There is a sequel to this movie, but I personally prefer the original for some goofy, creepy fun. Is this gonna be your favorite movie? I highly doubt it, but will you enjoy watching it in the pitch dark on a cool autumn night? Absolutely! Ironically, the best way to watch it is streaming it on Netflix and not via your VCR.
Gremlins is one of those fun mixes between comedy and “horror.” It was made in 1984, so don’t be disappointed when you see less than impressive detail or lack of CGI in this movie, expect to watch a fun, silly and somewhat creepy movie about little furry creatures called mogwai that can’t get wet. It is not a horrifying film, but you’d probably guess that from looking at the movie poster, or learning that it was made in the early 80’s. It is a 106-minute rendition of the silly 1980’s version of horror. It won’t scare the pants off of you but keep in mind, Roger Ebert did call it “fun” so there’s that. Additionally, if that doesn’t entice you enough, Gizmo is just so friggin cute! Yes he is, oh yes he is. This movie is perfect if you want to get into the Halloween spirit (haha ghost pun) in a fun, light way, without a bunch of gore or jump scares. If you have small kids in the house (hopefully you don’t just have random small kids in your house) that want to dip their toes into the scary movie genre, maybe share this film with them. Or you could hunker down and keep the fun to yourself, screw those kids anyway.
Many people criticize the SAW films for being “torture porn” but that really started with all the drawn-out sequels. Was the original movie free of these accusations? No, but in my opinion, it is the best and most enjoyable to watch. Feel free to view any of the films in the series and you’ll get the same basic premise, suspense, bloody deaths, creative traps and a poor attempt at a storyline when we all really just came for the blood. But why I believe the first is the best is because of the simplicity that the movie operates on. It was twisted and horrific like the others in the series but more in an actual puzzle-solving way instead of people just being put into traps for the sake of them being killed. The famous bathroom setting sends chills down your spine as soon as you see it. Watching the characters try to figure their way free is suspenseful and stomach-churning at every turn and the twist at the end brings it all together. If blood, suspense, creepy theme music and gut-wrenching screams are your bag (that’s not my bag baby -Austin Powers) then get to it ya crazies!
This film twisted my mind and sent my skin crawling the first time I watched it. I mean, just look at that bunny suit! But then again, I am wearing this man suit, so I can’t really talk. If you don’t get that reference, stop reading right now and go watch this movie. Not only is it a good source of the heeby-jeebies for the Halloween season, but it is one of my all-time favorite movies. The story follows a young boy named Donnie (obviously) and the deterioration of his mind as he tries to decipher visions of a doomsday scenario, all while being led around by a creepy rabbit named Frank. Frank’s voice alone might make you pull your blanket up to your chin and give a quick glance behind you if you’re watching alone in the dark (Which is recommended for these sorts of movies). This film will undoubtedly have you muttering “what the fuck” quite often as the plot unfolds before you. Like, seriously, why do I give a shit about an old lady crossing the street to get her mail, wait are they really trying to explain quantum physics and time travel to me right now? Just go with it, seriously because by the end it all makes sense and it is quite a satisfying adventure. If you dig sociopathic teens, arson and creepy bunnies in dark movie theatres, give this movie a whirl, trust me, you won’t be disappointed.
So this movie is great because…HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA just kidding, don’t waste your time with this movie, it doesn’t do the Anime any justice and the casting/acting is, well…awful.
The Nightmare Before Christmas
No way I could leave this movie off the list. This is a classic Halloween movie and probably one of the first movies that pops into your head when the topic is brought up. This is one of Tim Burton’s best and most enjoyable films in his career in my personal opinion. It’s cooky, chock full of catchy songs and best of all: features a cute little skeleton dog named zero. The film follows Jack Skellington, the ruler of Halloween town (sweet gig). Jack discovers Christmas town and attempts to bring the merry holiday of Christmas to his own town, but sadly runs into some problems with the citizens. I don’t want to give away too much of the story more than that, I want you to be able to experience the fun for yourself if you haven’t already seen it. If you’re a fan of Tim Burton or fun, nostalgic adventures, you’re going to undoubtedly love this movie. If you’ve already seen and loved this movie before, why not throw it on in celebration of the holiday? Come on, You know you want to.
A quick bonus for you guys, if you want to live the horror movie action, Check out The Friday the 13th game by Gun Media. The production value is kinda shotty, but its fun to live out the action as a terrified camper or in the murderous role of Jason himself! Just like the movies, the game is cheesy and a bit buggy, but it’s a whole new way to experience a popular horror movie.
So what did you think Misfits? You like my list? Or was it worse than Jason X (the one where Jason goes to…space)? If you dug it, drop it a like and comment down below. If you thought I could do better, have suggestions for me or just want to say hey, feel free to comment or send a message to any of our social media accounts.
Don’t Forget to subscribe to our blog, Twitter, Facebook and Instagram to get alerts about new content and updates on our upcoming podcast November 27th! Until next time Misfits, this is JJ signing off. Happy Halloween!